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Office Phrases - new definitions. [ office humor ]

Commonly Used Phrases at the Office and... What they really mean!
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1. For your information, please. (FYI)
Meaning: I don't know what to do with this, so please keep it.
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2. Noted and returned.
Meaning: I don't know what to do with this, so please keep it little while.
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3. Review and comment.

Meaning: Do the dirty work so that I can forward it.
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4. Action please.
Meaning: Get yourself involved for me. Don't worry, I'll claim the credit.
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5. For your necessary action.
Meaning: It's your headache now.
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6. Copy to.
Meaning: Here's a share of my headache.
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7. For your approval, please.
Meaning: Put your neck on the chopping board for me please.
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8. Action is being taken.
Meaning: Your correspondence is lost and I am trying to locate it.
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9. Your letter is receiving our attention.
Meaning: I am trying to figure out what you want.
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10. Please discuss.
Meaning: I don't know what the hell this is, so please brief me.
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11. For your immediate action.
Meaning: Do it NOW! Or I will get into serious trouble.
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12. Please reply soon.
Meaning: Please be efficient. It makes me look inefficient.
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13. We are investigating/processing your request with the relevant authorities.
Meaning: They are causing the delay, not us.
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14. Regards.
Meaning: Thanks and bless you for reading all the crap.