Astrological prayers !!!

Aries
Dear God, please give me patience... and could you do it right now?
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Taurus
Dear God, help me accept change, but not too quick.
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Gemini
Dear God! Who is God? Where is God? Why is God?
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Cancer
Dear God!!!
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Leo
Yes?
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Virgo
Dear God, please make us perfect and don't mess it up like You did the last time.
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Libra
Dear God, please help me to be decisive, but on the other hand, what do you think is best?
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Scorpio
Our Father, forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors, even though the b*****ds don't deserve it!
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Sagittarius
Dear Lord, if I've told you once, I've told you a million times, help me stop exaggerating.
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Capricorn
Dear God! I'd like to ask you to help me, but I learned a long time ago not to rely on anyone else!
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Aquarius
Dear God, I know I like change, but this chaos is ridiculous!!
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Pisces
Dear Lord, as long as I'm going to drink this fifth of Scotch tonight, please use the stimulation for Thy glory.
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